You are listening to My Freedom Grove podcast with Gretchen Hernandez, episode 88.
Welcome to My Freedom Grove podcast. The all inclusive podcast that teaches mindset and business tools. We'll help you rise as your authentic self. Be unshakable with your emotional freedom and unstoppable in achieving any goal and living your purpose. I'm your host, Gretchen Hernandez. If you want to put your mental health first in life, relationships and business, you've come to the right place.
Hi, my strong friends. So we are in the final days of October. You've got two months left of this year to make it a wonderful year for yourself. I know with all of the pandemic, things have been so tough. Life has been a lot different. You've probably had a lot of emotional stuff going on as you're trying to create your future.
Whether we liked it or not. We had this external force that came and made us reevaluate. What's important in our life, and who we wanted to be.
So today's episode, we're going to talk about future you. Because you've had a lot of time to think about what you like in your life and what you don't like in your life. In my podcast, I like to give you a lot of practical advice on things that you can do, like step-by-step things. In our last episode, we went over process maps and standard work cards. These are very tactical things, but there's also another side of me that is more philosophical. And so I've had some clients say, I like the woo in you.
So this is all about who is it that we want to be? We have different facets of ourselves that work really well. And there might be other parts of us that we're like, yeah, I don't really like this part of me. I want something a little bit different.
I have a lot of visions of my future me that I'm trying to evolve into. There's a lot of stuff from who I've always been that I want to take with me. And there are some stuff that I want to let go of. So one of the things that's helping me to step into my future me is going to a conference next week.
This is a large investment of money on my part. It's because I really want this future version of me. One of those trendy phrases that I keep hearing is a better version of you or be your best self. I don't really like that because I think that along the way, you were your best self, as much as you could be with whatever was going on in your life and with whatever tools you had available to you.
Being a different version of you is just different. It doesn't mean that it's better or that it's worse. It's just; you’re trying something different. So I want to go and try something different. Is this going to be the best version of me? I don't know. It's an experiment. I want to go. I want to learn new things. I want to be around different types of people that I really appreciate and admire. And I want to try stuff on.
And it might be that as I go along, I decide, yeah, that's really not for me, but maybe it is. It's just something different.
So next week, I am headed out to Texas to the Fearless Business Workshop. One of the headliners there is Corinne Crabtree, and I really admire her. She's a down-to-earth person. She loves to talk with other people. She's a real people person. She cares about other people, no matter how successful she becomes in her business. I want to go be around her. I want to go hear all of this stuff that she went through in order to create a successful company for herself.
I was inspired by a podcast that I listened to recently where she was the guest. And she said something really important. She said you need to hurry up and get over your emotional stuff because there's people out there waiting for you. And I thought, oh my gosh, that can apply to so many of us.
We're all humans. We all have emotional stuff that goes on. And yeah, there's people out there that need us. What I love about Corinne is that she talks about all of the struggles that she went through. She talks about all of the struggles that she still goes through because she's human, just like I am. And I like to be around other people that are authentic, that are human, that share those things so that we can all help each other to rise. We can help each other to be able to help even more people out in the world. These are all things that I want for me as future me.
I already have some of it, but I want even more. So I'm going to go and be in a room with even more people that can help me to move forward into future me.
So let's talk about future you, who do you want to be? In this episode, we're going to do a lot of daydreaming, and we're going to imagine your future you and everything that's possible for you. And then just because you know I like to get you into action. I'm going to share Newton's three laws of motion on how you can get into action so that you can actually be future you.
There's nothing wrong with current you. There's a lot of things that are perfectly right and wonderful about current you. And I want you to reflect on that. I want you to pull out a journal for this episode. I want you to do a lot of writing.
I want to celebrate who you are as a person. Write down all of the things that are wonderful about current you. What are all of the things that you would keep?
Now, there's a lot of stuff that has happened in your past. There's a lot of thoughts that we have today about our past that make us think bad things about ourselves. Make us think that we're not good enough, or we're not lovable, or that there's just something wrong. But here's the thing the past has already happened. All we have for sure is today, we can look around us today, and we can see everything that exists.
Now, future is a complete blank slate. We may think we know what the future looks like because we keep referencing the past and what we think our life is going to look like. But the future is a wonderful, beautiful blank slate.
We can create anything we want. We can be any person that we want. We can take all of those wonderful things about us, and then we can add to it.
What are extra skills that we would want to learn or extra ways of being? Of showing up in the world? You can have any personality you want. I recently saw, I think it was Corinne who posted a book title that said Personality Isn't Permanent. And I thought, whoa, I may have to go read that book, but just the title was so intriguing. Personality Isn't Permanent. And there's things about my personality that I would like to shift.
What are things about your personality that you would like to shift? Go ahead and write that down. What are some of those things about your personality that you would like to shift? Is it the amount of confidence that you have?
Is it the amount of capability that you have to do things? Is it how much you believe in yourself in your ability to do anything?
Maybe it's the amount of comfort you have with talking with strangers, brand new people. There are so many people out in the world that you can help, but do you feel comfortable even talking to them? Knowing that your current personality is of a very strong individual that has made it through a lot of stuff. Is there any part that you want to be a little bit softer on? Do you want to be able to accept help from other people? Do you want to be able to be a little bit more vulnerable and share when you're struggling? When you could use a hug from someone? We're just going to allow ourselves to dream a bit?
So my favorite Disney movie is Aladdin. I love the genie. The genie is my favorite character of all time. Because he can just come in and grant you any wish you want. With the exception, of course, you can't bring anybody back from the dead. And you can't make anyone fall in love with you. But other than that, the genie can grant any wish.
So, as you're thinking about future you and you had a genie, what would you wish from that genie? That genie can grant anything about you. You don't have to have any limitations. You don't have to worry about what other people would think, because as part of the genie and all of his magic, he can make it so that everybody else already sees you this way. They already accept you this way. There's no change, transition that they have to go through to get used to you being this new person.
So if you had genie granting you any wish about who you are, how you show up in the world, what would that look like?
I'm going to invite you to do something that I usually don't do in my podcast. I'm going to invite you to actually pause this episode so that you can spend time with your journal, writing out everything that you could imagine. Let your mind just go wild about future you. And if the genie could grant you anything, and that the rest of the world would see you as this person, that this is your authentic self going forward.
Go ahead and take a few minutes to just write down everything about who you are and how you're showing up in the world. Now put a timer on, maybe for like five or 10 minutes, and come back to me. So go ahead and pause. All right. Talk to you in a couple minutes.
All right. Welcome back. So wasn't that a fun exercise? Doesn't it feel liberating thinking if a genie could come and just grant your wishes? It's kind of like if you win the lottery, right? It's like, Ooh, just imagine all of this wonderful stuff comes true.
It feels so good to dream and just know that there's not going to be any resistance that it's just all going to happen. It's inevitable. So I'm really curious. What is it that you wrote down? How did you describe future you? You can even email this to me because I am so curious to learn everything that you had to say. You can email me [email protected]. Share it with me.
What did you envision as your future you? Let's dream together. The more people that get in on your dream, the more likely it is to happen. So what was it? What did you look like? What were you doing on your day to day basis? Was your routine the same as it always has been? Are you doing different activities? Are you living in the same place?
I mean, your future you is pretty amazing. You can do just about anything that you want to do. Are you living in the same place? Do you have the same people around you? Remember, you get to design your whole reality. Future is a total blank slate. So future you gets to have anything. You don't have to bring forth any baggage from the past. It's all been resolved. Any past traumas or bad experiences that you have, it just doesn't exist in your future because really it doesn't. It's just thoughts about it that might pop up. But future you doesn't have to have those thoughts anymore in the past all lives in the past; you just have the future.
So what does your day-to-day look like? Is it the same every day of the week? Is it different on the weekends? Maybe your weekends are now in the middle of the week. It can be anything you want.
What expression would naturally fall on your face? What feelings would you feel at any given time? Is it always the same feeling? Do your feelings ebb and flow throughout the week or throughout the day? What mixture of feelings would you want to feel? Because remember, the genie can create anything. So what are those feelings that you're feeling?
So you're going, you're doing your day-to-day activities. When you feel those feelings, how does that show up in your body? How do you feel that? Like, is it just a calm, peaceful feeling in your body? Maybe there's something about future you that is really exciting and energetic. What does that feel like in your body?
When you're feeling those kinds of feelings, what does it make you want to do? Does it make you want to just lay down and relax with a huge smile on your face and just know everything is great and wonderful? Maybe you're so happy and content that you actually want to get up and dance and twirl around. Like feeling the sunshine, come in on your face. And you just want to twirl in the sunlight because things feel so great. You're so grateful for who you are, who you have become, and the life that you've created for yourself.
Maybe that gratitude is just bursting from you. It's so intense that you have to share it. Do you have to run out and hug someone because you're just so happy. It's like, I'm picturing all sorts of Disney movies in my head now of people running out and just like hugging.
Now, life doesn't have to be a Disney movie, of course. But what is it for you when you're feeling all of these emotions? What of actions are you taking? Are you singing? Are you dancing? Are you going off exploring new lands, new opportunities, meeting new people? Overall, I bet you feel alive.
How much aliveliness have you felt over the last couple of years? Now, I know a lot of circumstances were out of our control, but the future, the future you get to design. How do you feel alive?
Now think about all of the people that you want to have in that life with you. Because now that you're radiating these new feelings. ThIs new energy. Like energy tends to attract like energy. So who are those people that would be attracted into your life? And do you want all of those people in your life?
You can choose how many people you want. Maybe future you is like, yeah, I don't like crowds. I want to go somewhere where there are less crowds. Or maybe future you is like, you know what, I actually like to be social. I want to have opportunities where I can get together with other people, other people that have this kind of energy, that's who I want to go spend my time with.
Right now, you have a collection of people in your life with your current version of you. Of those people, which ones do you want to have around future you. Do you want to have all of them? Do you want to have more? Do you want to have less? Maybe you want to have a different quantity of time with these different individuals because not everybody is going to have this same energy as future you.
So what does that look like? You can create any combination that you want. You can still have people in your life, but maybe they're in your life in a smaller amount of time or a different location. And that's okay because you can still go and enjoy some time together. It just doesn't have to be as much as what current you is spending with that person.
Because when you make space in your life more time available to invite other people in, then you can change that dynamic for your life. If you want a different combination of energy, pallets, like as if you're painting a picture of all of the different energy personas in your life, where would you make room on your life palette for these different energies to come in? See, I told you, we're going to get a little philosophical, a little woo woo in this episode.
This is just all about dreaming and creating today. Since we're talking about palettes and paint and stuff, what color would you assign to these different individuals in your life? You know, it's like some people talk about auras and there being different colors of auras. I haven't studied that. Since we're talking about palettes, why not consider a painting of what your life is? And if you were to use your thumb as the mechanism, to put some paint on to represent an individual, what are all of those different colors that you would use to represent all of the people that are in your life? They can be different colors of paint, the ones that represent the essence of that person for you. What would that look like? How many would be on there?
What distribution would they be? Are they in little groupings, separate groupings? Is it everybody all of the time? Maybe there are some colors in your paint box that you have never considered using before. What would that be like if you just mixed it up a little bit, add it in a different color here or there.
How would your life be different? What would be the dynamic of that change for you? So you, as future you, has now created all of this change in the world, all of the different dynamics of people around you. What could that look like? What could your world look like? What feels best for you?
Now, I'm going to give you a little challenge. If you were trying to describe future you and your future life in five bullet points, what would it be?
One of the things that I've learned is that if you want your life to change, you have to be able to talk about it. You have to verbalize who it is that you want to become, what you want your life to look like. The more that you can express it, the more that you can share it with people, the more likely it is to happen.
It's called an enrolling conversation. You're enrolling them in your vision. So if you take the time to do those five bullet points, it helps you to figure out what's the most important thing that is repeatable, that you could share with other people on how you want to be.
Because those other people they'll start to look for those opportunities for you. They'll share different details with you on how you can move towards those five bullet points for future you or your future life.
Now dreaming feels really, really good. I love doing these exercises of just dreaming about the future because it's just unlimited. Some people talk about manifestation, where you can create this vision, and then it comes true. The more you talk about it, the more that it happens. They'll create vision boards. They'll look at the vision board. They will stare at it. They'll think about it with manifestation. It makes it seem like that's all you have to do. And then voila it just happens.
But if that was true, how many people would have won the lottery by now? How many times have we dreamt about buying that winning lottery ticket? And then poof, you win it.
So what actually needs to happen? You need to have that vision, and then you need to take action in order to have that happen. When you look at future you, there are activities that future you is going to be doing that current you doesn't do yet. So you have to learn how to get in the habit of doing those new things, so that you are a future you.
There might be things that you need to learn, skills that you need to build, or just doing those activities that you know, you're going to suck at it first, but eventually, you're going to get really good at.
So how do you bridge that gap from going from that dream, that vision of future you, to having future you become your reality? Lucky for you, the universe is already designed to help you. There's forces that exist that we might not even recognize that are helpful to us. If you've ever heard that phrase, this is happening for you, not to you. This is exactly what I'm talking about.
There are things in our life that we view as being really negative, and we try to escape it. We try to ignore it, but these are some of those things that the universe has put into place to help move us forward to becoming future you or having your future life.
There are many universal laws that are out there. You'll hear about the law of attraction. The law of deliberate creation, the law of allowing. Those are some of my favorite that come from Abraham Hicks. But today, I want to talk about some physics laws.
So woo comes in all shapes and sizes. Not everybody likes to talk about the universe and things that they can't really see. Yet, somehow we all gathered around physics and Isaac Newton and all of his laws that he came up with motion.
We see an apple falls from a tree, and it can hit someone in the head. It's something we can see. It's tangible. So let's talk about Isaac Newton's three laws of motion, and we're going to use this to see how is the universe helping us so that we are moving towards our future you and future life?
So the very first law, a body continues in its state of rest or in uniform motion in a straight line, unless acted upon by a force. So a simple short way of saying this is a body in motion stays in motion or a body, not in motion, stays not in motion.
In order to become future you or to have a different life, there needs to be an external force that is going to act upon you that sets you off your current course. That usually shows up as some type of discomfort in your life. Something that doesn't feel like it's working. What external force do you have showing up in your life that might not be pleasant, but it's something that is trying to force you off the path of being your current self? Think about all of those things in your life that, right now, you're really not happy with.
How have you viewed those external forces? Have you viewed it with anger, with resentment? Have you just tried to ignore it and hope it'll go away? Or are these external forces something that you could start to view with gratitude? You want to be your future you right? You want to have that new life. How is it that these external forces that are showing up are really there because it's the only way to create change in your life?
If you didn't have these external forces, you would stay at current you. You would stay with your current life. If you've found yourself wanting to be future you or having a different life, and it doesn't seem to be changing. Nothing seems to be changing. You might feel a little bit of apathy, look around. Maybe the external force isn't there. Maybe there is no discomfort showing up in your life that is helping you to move and to grow, and to push you in a different direction.
Or is it possible that that external force was always there, but somebody else has come in to try to minimize the discomfort of that. Or you found a way of ignoring it so that it seems like it just doesn't even exist. And then you're looking around wondering why can't I move forward? Well, what is that external force? Maybe you can uncover it so you can have it help you.
When you think about future you, is this really the person that you want to be? This future life that you've envisioned is this really what you want to have? If it is embrace that external force that has shown up, pay attention to it, acknowledge that it exists. Even be grateful for it. If it's a huge bill, this is going to sound a little strange. Maybe take that huge bill and frame it and look at it every day with gratitude of thank you, huge bill for showing up because you've created enough discomfort in my life, enough force in my life that it's pushing me into being my future me.
Newton's second law. A body acted upon by a force moves in such a manner that the time rate of change of momentum equals the force.
So we're talking about speed of change. Everybody has a different comfort level with the speed of change. There are some people that really can't stand change and others that really enjoy it. They like it to go super fast, and let's just do it. And then there's everybody in between. So this external force that you have, does it have any due date assigned to it? Who loves due dates? Right? A lot of times, it can create extra stress on us that we want to just go away, and we might try to negotiate those due dates because it's going to require us to change a lot faster.
So if we think back to school time, and we had a paper due, that due date was there as a way of helping us. Because if there's no due date, we can get things done just whenever we're never going to speed up and get to that future you or your future life if there's no due date. You can just take any path that you want to. But the due date was there to try to help you. You'd figure out how to get that paper written. Even if it wasn't the best one ever. And you'd turn it in because there was a due date.
You'd take whatever consequences came. Sometimes you'd surprise yourself, and you'd get a really high grade on a paper that you did in just a couple of hours. There might be other times that you spent a ton of time, and you still got a C on that paper, but either way, you moved forward. You got to find out an answer to how you did on something, either way, you learned. And you grew along the way.
There's this old saying, if you want something done, give it to a busy person. So as you're evolving into your future you, what speed of change do you want? Do you want to be a busy person that can crank out a lot of stuff? Do you want to be someone that has no due dates, and you just get it done eventually, whenever it feels right? Or are you somewhere in between?
What external forces do you have that you've put in place that can help you to adjust that speed to the speed that you actually want? What is the right speed for you? Just because somebody else can go at a faster speed doesn't mean that's the right speed for you. If you create something that has a due date that's too aggressive, you can either hit that due date, but you might risk the chance of burning out or even creating some health problems for yourself.
Or you might miss the date completely. And then you'll have all of these negative thoughts about yourself and start causing more harm. That's not future you! Future you is not going to be mean to you. Future you is going to feel great and wonderful.
So I want to introduce you to a term that's called healthy tension. Healthy tension is an external force that will create a forward momentum at a speed that's right for you. Each person's healthy speed is different. Healthy tension is just enough to have you moving forward, but not in a way that is going to jeopardize your health.
What speed of change is healthy for you? What external force can you establish that can keep you moving forward so that you can become future you? One of the things that I did for myself was when I registered for this workshop; this was a future me thing. It was also four months in the future. It had a due date. Now, when you're doing something new, there may be times when you think I don't want to do this anymore. I want to give up.
But when you create something in the future you have to stay committed to it. You've already invested in it. So even though along the way, you might think, oh, I want to quit. I want to do something new. You've already invested in something. So you kind of have to keep going forward. Otherwise, you've lost your investment.
I also like to use Google calendar to schedule in some times where I have to go and do something. I might create a little flexibility in there for myself, but by committing to it, by putting it there and it's visible, I know when I want to get things done, and then I go about doing them.
So what are some extra things that you can do for yourself? Some extra visuals that you can create for yourself. Maybe you decide that you want to have an accountability buddy. I lead an accountability mastermind where many of us show up and we may not have completed the thing that we wanted to, but we've made progress towards it.
So just the fact of having something that you show up to every single week might be that external force that helps you keep having momentum, that healthy tension to move forward.
Next is Newton's third law. If two bodies exert forces on each other, these forces are equal in magnitude and opposite in direction.
So you might've heard this phrase "every action has an equal and opposite reaction." As you become future you, you'll be contributing in the world in a new way. So first, let's get really clear.
These are the actions that you're putting out there, that motion that you're putting out there. What is that contribution that you're doing as future you? What is the impact that it has on other people or on the world in general? What is the value that is going out?
Now in order to flow with the universe, to flow with this third law that Newton has established for us, that we've seen. We've seen this in the world. You have to allow whatever you put out to come back to you. So if you're putting out a contribution, you are receiving a contribution back. If you are putting out an impact, there's an impact that will come back to you. If you're putting a value out into the world, a value is going to come back. It is equal, and it is opposite. You go left. Something else comes, right?
What is it? What is that thing that has come back? You may not always recognize it. And at times, you may even resist it. If you are resisting, receiving anything that's coming back, you're away. You're interfering with your progress at moving forward into being future you. If you're resisting contribution coming your way, then you're going to be limited in the contribution that you can send out into the world.
One tangible example you can consider is learning. If you are contributing, teaching things to other people, are you also allowing other people to teach you? I personally love to coach other people. So I'm also willing to accept them coaching me back.
Just this week, I had one of my first clients who is going on in her career. She has learned a new technique in helping people, and she needed someone to practice on. So I said, yes, I raised my hand. It's like, I will allow you to practice on me because I could use some help. So by allowing that, that will allow me to continue to contribute out to the world because I have received something in return.
If you are continuously helping people, will you allow other people to come back and help you? If you're giving a value out into the world, what value will you allow to come back to you? If someone is offering to give you something of value, and you're saying, no, no, I don't need that. That's okay. Oh no, you don't have to do that. You're now going to limit your ability to give value out into the world as your future self because you're violating Newton's third law. If you give out, you have to allow equal and opposite to come back.
So future you, how much do you want to contribute to the world?
What type of impact, what type of value are you going to be willing to receive that? To be open? Look for it. Say yes to it. You want to work with the laws, not against them.
So just to recap, in this episode, we're talking about future you. You got to dream about future you. You get to dream about what you want your life to look like. And then, how do you make the universal laws work for you?
We specifically used Newton's three laws of motion because, in order to make any new thing happened, there has to be motion. So we're using his three laws of motion. First one is to embrace the external forces that are coming to try to change you off of your current path. Otherwise, you stay the same. Body in motion stays in motion, or a body, not in motion stays not in motion. So embrace those external forces that are coming to try to push you forward towards your future self or your future life.
Newton's second law where we're trying to have external forces to help set the speed of change, create your healthy tension. What is the right speed of change for you? And what does that look like? What can that external force be like? That will help you to set that pace.
And then finally, Newton's third law where an action always has an equal and opposite reaction. Allow it to come in and stop resisting. The more you can allow in, the bigger the impact you can have as your future you; the bigger your life can be. Just allow it in.
You have two months left of 2021. How much of future you do you want to have appear? Next week, I'm taking a step forward and being future me by going and being in the room with other people that have gone the path that I want to go. I get to go and learn from them.
What is an action that you can take this week that is going to help you move towards future you? I can't wait to share the shifts that I get from going on this adventure next week. I'll be thinking about you every step of the way.
I hope that you have a great week. I'll talk with you soon. Bye-bye.
Thank you for listening to My Freedom Grove Podcast. I can't wait to work with you directly. I'll help you to be your authentic self, to have amazing relationships, and to live your purpose. I invite you to check out Unshakable Men and Unshakable Women. The Unshakable programs will give you all of the tools, the coaching, and the humanity to help you rise in life, relationships, and business. To learn more, go to MyFreedomGrove.com/workwithme. I can't wait to see you there.
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